Randy M Cross
  • Crosscuts: the later years
  • This is Me
  • Get In Touch
  • Crosscuts: the later years
  • This is Me
  • Get In Touch

The   Fourth   Life

Living   Intentionally

Checking in.

11/18/2021

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​Hi Folks,
Let me say first of all how overwhelmed and humbled I am to have received email notes from so many of you wishing me well, and praying for my healing.  It has indeed been quite the journey, and one I never would have believed I would have ever taken.
So, as things stand right now, I will have a torn rotator cuff, which sometimes behaves itself and other times, when I forget and stretch the arm and put something heavy in my hand, I remember what the word “torn” truly means.  Now, if I were in charge of the world, which unfortunately right now I expect to be held up by paperwork or something, the doctors who are taking care of me (and being paid quite well, thank you!) would by now have waved their magic wands, and repaired what is torn, and let me have the opportunity to experience all the pain and healing that comes with rehab.  Looking forward to it.
Unfortunately, that’s only one half of the “stuff” I get to work with.  Not to go into great detail, but somehow, I am operating with a couple of quarts low in the blood department, and so I have some procedures scheduled for January.  I also have some “thing” going on with my kidneys, and so I am spending most of my days drinking glass after glass of water for some reason.  I then go in, and have more blood drawn, and then wait for the magic reports that show I have “minor progress,” but a long ways to go.  Now again, I know there are some things that the medical folks can do – as uncomfortable and icky as they are – to take care of where there might be something not quite sealed up in the blood department, but they are also watching another situation, and waiting for it to heal before they can move forward and roto root me up and down, and fix it all.
So – here we are a week from Thanksgiving and I am spending my time not doing a whole lot.  I can’t lift much, or extend my arm, and I have to take my pills on a pretty strict basis, to heal up things so I can be healthy enough to get medically whacked again.    Now, I have always been a pretty positive guy, and have believed truly that all will be well in the end, and if it not yet well, it is not yet the end.  This has been a strong and pushy challenge, though.  I need to keep reminding myself that as much as it is true that self-praise stinks, then self-pity stinks even more.  It is true as humans that each of us tends to set the bar of “oh woe is me” pretty low, when things are not going well.  Our normal pattern of activity appears to carry the perception that what we are going through at any given time is far worse than what anyone else is going through.  Hence, the pity. 
However – that’s a bunch of baloney.  Yes, we are all given the opportunity to experience wonderful and fantastic episodes of life, and we also now and then walk though the swinging door into the room which carries the name of tragedy, or disease, or injury or just plain bad stuff.  We all go there in our lives – that’s part of the human condition. So, I have to remind myself, and anyone else who is listening, that it truly is not what happens to us that matters – no matter what that happens to be.  Instead, it becomes the challenge and work to decide and to be resolved in our lives to determine what we do with what happens to us that is the critical and key turning point to living an intentional and abundant life.
Right now, things are kind of crappy, it seems.  It “should” be better, “must” improve, but at the root of it all, my joy in life rests in my own mind and heart, when I decide to look at what is happening to me from the point of God’s powerful love and sustaining grace, and not from the view of the world’s largest pity party, where the plates and cups are all chipped and cracked.
So, I have my task set before me, as we all do.  Again, I cherish your prayers, and will once again repeat that it’s not all about me – it’s just what I am going through right now.  I pray for your health as well, and for a future that is joyful and hopeful, as together we enjoy this life placed in our hands.
 
I’ll try to write more often – probably not every day, since it kind of chews up the right shoulder – but especially as we move into this holy and great time of the year, I’d like to spend it with you all.  Take care, and blessings.
 
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A Bit of a Pause.

11/5/2021

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​Hello Friends,
I had not planned to miss three whole days of writing, but unfortunately, a sore shoulder that I have been dealing with for years decided on Tuesday to bloom into full-grown rotator cuff rip, tear, and, well, you can guess.  I did get to experience an MRI, and take even more pills in addition to the many I have already been privileged to take over the last week or so.  I honestly did not think I would have all these various maladies to deal with, but I guess I have moved fully into not-so-good health at least for a while.
This morning I am typing one finger at a time, but I wanted to connect with you all. Over the coming weeks I will have all sorts of procedures and operations, so frankly that means my focus will be there, along with trying to find a comfortable sleeping position.
I say all that to give you the unfortunate news that I will have to push the pause button on my time with you all.  I’ve still lots of stories to share – It’s just that the idea of putting it down on paper has become a literal pain.
So, for now I will have to think of you fondly and hope for a speedy healing so I can get back to this thing that I love.  Thanks for your patience and your prayers, and know that all will be well in the end.  Live intentionally, and treat other as kind when you can, and just when you must.
See you soon….. Peace.

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A Day for the Saints.

11/1/2021

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​When I was in seminary so many eons ago, my intern year was spent in New Orleans, where I worked at a totally white local church in the Uptown area, and also taught college English to the kids who came out of the projects, and were (most of them) the first in their entire family history to actually go to college.  The paradox between those two settings was pretty powerful.
The pastor I worked under at the church was well known and respected in their annual conference, and it happened that one of the very old retired African-American pastors died, and he was asked to serve as a pall bearer for the funeral.  Unfortunately, he had recently thrown his back out, and couldn’t perform the task, and so in a strange twist of circumstances, he asked me to fill in for him.
And so it happened that a young white kid from North Dakota ended up a pallbearer for a black pastor’s funeral in New Orleans.  Let that sink in for a moment.  By the way, being a pallbearer in New Orleans is a bit different from the position up here in the northland.  Every one of us had a red rose pinned to our lapel, and were given white gloves to wear.  We carried the casket up the aisle at the service, and then carried it back out again.  Also, when we got to the cemetery, the hearse couldn’t drive through to the burial location, so once again, we toted the casket a good block to get to the sepulcher.  Oh, I forgot to mention that because the city of New Orleans sits below sea level, no one is buried in the ground, like you would see up here, out of the prairie.  Instead, the cemeteries look like small cities, with all sorts of above ground whitewashed tombs where the casket is placed – at about shoulder level – and remains there until a few months later when the casket is then removed, and the remains are pushed to the back of the sepulcher, in preparation for the next family member.
So there I was, following the lead, and trying not to make some embarrassing mistake.  As we walked, in front of us was what they call a “second line,” which consisted of a group of folks dressed up to the nines, playing brass instruments in a dirge as we made our way to the tomb.
We put the casket into the tomb – I was fully part of the team, now, as their token white guy – and the funeral director closed up the opening.  Everything was silent for about a minute, and then I about jumped out of my skin as the second line hit the first blaring note, and began the traditional, incredibly loud and almost boisterous rendition of “When the Saints Go Marching In.” 
The procession back to the entrance of the cemetery included dancing and smiles and a real celebration, as the air was filled with everything you could find that was joyful.  It was truly an event, as the life of a faithful pastor of that community was celebrated, and without direction, the community blew the lid off any solemn or sad atmosphere.  Even today, I consider that it was a privilege to have a front row seat for something that is so quintessentially New Orleans.
I’ve led dozens of funerals since that time during my years as a pastor, and many indeed were celebrations of a faithful life.  It’s also true that the folks who look more like me have had a greater tendency to be solemn, and quiet and tearful, even as a body is committed to the earth, and the soul committed to God.  In a sense, it’s almost as if we are more greatly filled with the sadness of someone no longer with us, than the understanding that the person is now in the loving arms of God, where we all hope to be someday. In that sense, the folks in New Orleans “get it” – I think it probably goes back to the times of slavery, when life on this earth was a hard, and often horrible endurance, and so when it happened that someone would actually find freedom – even in death – from that life, then it was something to celebrate, and to look forward to ourselves.
So today, the day after All Hallows’ Eve, it is known in the Western Church as All Saints Day.  It’s not Memorial Day.  It’s not a day to go to the cemetery, but instead to go to church.  It is meant to be a day of true, unbridled celebration of the love of God in Christ Jesus, which brings us eternal life in the presence of the Creator of the Universe.  That’s a big deal. It is a day, to be sure, when we recall those “saints” who have gone before us this past year into eternal joy.
By the way, in the Protestant tradition, a saint is a bit different than the Catholics, who venerate and canonize persons of great faith whose life provides the means of miracles, especially of healing after their death.  For us as Protestants, we appear to be a bit more democratic, and consider a saint to be anyone who can claim the name of Christian, and see themselves as one of God’s chosen people to bless the world.  So – look in the mirror, and see a saint today.  Even more so, we celebrate those lives, and the experience of their eternal life, now lived in heaven.  What a great and positive and joyful thing, don’t you think?
And so, today I imagine in my mind Mom and Dad, and my brother Ray, gathered around the throne of God, offering praise and glory for God and God’s wonderful gift.  As well, Cheri’s folks, and especially her mom who died in August, find their place there, in the presence of God for all eternity.  That’s why the hymn written by the Bishop of Wakefield, William How, back in the 1800s, is such a powerful image for us:   For all the saints, who from their labors rest – who Thee, by faith, before the world confessed Thy name, O Jesus, be forever blessed.  Alleluia!
Sure, a little more raucous is:  O when the saints go marching in, O when the saints go marching in!  O Lord, I want to be in that number, when the saints go marching in!
However your background and preference, today is a day for the saints who have gone before us, and wait for our arrival.  May this be a holy day for you, as you recall and give thanks to God for the saints who have been in your life, and who are in your life today!
 
Word for the day:   cantabile.  Pronounced ken-TAH-bill-ay.  Our word is most recently Italian in nature, since it fits the Italian nature.  It means “singable” but also smooth and flowing, like a beautiful song.  Going back earlier in time, we do find it as a Latin root, cantare, which is “to sing.”  However, the more exact root is cantabilis, which invites us to think, not just about a song or singing, but what is truly worthy of being sung.   That doesn’t include all songs, to be sure.  I hope you hear a wonderful cantabile today…
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    After 43 years of ministry, Randy Cross lived his "fourth life" and shared about retirement, living boldly and intentionally in our world. To be sure, there was some North Dakota thrown in.

    His son, Aaron, now operates this site in honor of his father.

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